Refining your Purpose

Posted by | 0 comments

The year was 1998 and I was feeling excitement and joy! I was clear! I had the skills and desires to assist others in developing business success. Although, I had no idea how and what that would look like.

I was hiring my third business coach, who began our first conversation with a question.

“What do you want?”

What was he talking about “What do you want?”  I thought he wasn’t going to be a very good coach if he didn’t understand that I wanted a successful coaching practice.

So, I answered with something like; “a successful coaching practice.” To which he responded:

“What do you want?”

Inside my head was; “Wow, what is wrong with this man that he doesn’t understand I want a successful coaching practice.” Self-doubt was rising, and I was questioning if I had just hired the WRONG person!

The process of him asking the same question and me answering with the same answer continued for a few minutes until I had an ah-ha moment that he was asking me this question, to make sure that I was clear, precise and I could verbalize my career purpose.  Saying “a successful coaching practice” is an OK answer.  However, it didn’t inspire me to work or attract clients, nor did it open the pathway to having and enjoying a successful outcome.

Eventually, I was able to access my purpose that I wanted a successful coaching practice because I would feel fulfilled and that I was contributing to the growth others and using my unique gifts and talents to serve the world!  I finally had clarity!

  • Are you spending your time and energy engaged and enjoying your business?                                                                        
  • What clarity do you need to feel absolutely engaged and fulfilled?
  • Are YOU leveraging your unique gifts and talents in your career?
  • Would you like to attract more ideal clients and alliances?

If you do, the writing exercise below will assist you in refining your purpose and gaining clarity around your direction.

Living your life with purpose and meaning

You will need paper and pen (no typing) to benefit from this process.  There are only two questions, both of which you will discover, are very powerful.  Your answers to these questions can give you access to your focus, passion, and momentum in your career.


Write only in the positive.  Notice each time you write down something that you don’t want, turn it around, and write next to it what you DO want.

If you are feeling challenged and write only what you don’t want it means you have unresolved issue/s that want your attention first. Use an emotional release or forgiveness process to help you clear out the old issue. Then go back and restart this writing exercise.

Brain Science research is catching up with why this type of writing process make us happier and higher functioning humans.

This writing exercise is not about getting a new car or a raise, though that might happen. It is about leaving the ego thinking mind (for a period of time) and moving into your heart consciousness to access and a more satisfying self-expression.  It is common sense and a great reminder to disconnect from your outside world at least once a day to focus on what lights you up and the kind of future you want to create. When you are clearer and can hold your focus on your ‘why’ you are open to living your life on purpose as well as attracting a flow of goodness into your life.

What do you want?
Why do you want it?


You can use the process for different aspects of your life. For starters, use this for your career or leadership development.

For example: I want a fulfilling career. Under that, would be paraphrases like:

  • Work with like-minded people                                                                                
  • Have 10 ideal clients that give me referrals
  • I want to earn $____ in the next 6 months
  • Get invited to speak at conferences or tele-summits
  • Get support with my marketing
  • I want to have a weekly blog
  • Get my book published
  • Find and hire a great copywriter
  • Teach _____ 5 times a week,
  • Travel X times per month
  • Form/join a mastermind group.”



Go back and re-read your what you just wrote about this subject.  Is there anything you want to change, delete or add to what you wrote?  What are you imagining?  Make sure you write it down.

On a separate sheet of paper, answer the second question; “why do I want this?” In other words, what would having this (What) give to you, benefit you, do for you?


For example:

  • The extra income would allow me to ____
  • It would give me flexibility in my day.
  • I would be able to organize my day in a way that works for my lifestyle
  • I would feel a sense of freedom to do what I want to do, when I want to do it!                                   
  • I would feel like I am part of a team
  • I would have the support I need
  • I like knowing what my peers are doing
  • I feel alive when I teach
  • I feel fulfilled when I ________
  • I enjoy helping people with ____
  • I enjoy solving technical problems
  • It’s fun for me to _____



Now go back and re-read your writings about this subject.  Is there anything you want to change, delete or add to what you wrote?  What are you imagining?  Make sure you write it down.

Others who have done this writing exercise report that on the days that they write they have more energy and are more productive. They sense this process allows them to feel more clear, exciting, and more confident. One person said that they feel like they are walking on air and have more energy to anything and everything that comes their way.

Being more aware of “why” we are doing what we are doing gives our life more purpose and meaning. It opens our heart to more joy and well-being.

Imagine a world where everyone did this writing practice for 10 minutes every day. What an amazing place that could be!

Are you ready to get writing and refine your purpose?

Now that you’ve read this article, go back to the beginning and start writing!

Join us live for our next Generating your Leadership Influence series, we will be talking about Leading with Purpose.

Register here.

ReGina is available for private consultation, on-going coaching, workshops and presentations on Aligning with your Design and applying this revolutionary science for personal and professional success.
© Permission for reprint in its entirety and includes website address.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Copyright © 2008 – 2018 Align With Your Design